1 in 5 relationships start online. There are over 1,000 dating sites. It can be overwhelming to decide which sites to use or how to present yourself in your online profile. That's where online dating experts come in like Laurie Davis. (Fun fact:?She met her fiancee via Twitter).?Laurie is?an online dating coach and founder of?eFlirtExpert.com, which provides the ultimate guide to finding love online. I had the pleasure of reading?her book "Love at First Click: The Ultimate Guide to Online Dating." It?really clicked (get it?) with me because I've had quite the interesting experience with online dating myself.
Laurie and I had a pretty similar introduction to online dating. I found it fairly normal when there was still a lot of stigma around it. As it became more socially acceptable I would try to convince my friends to join because at least they'd get a date out of it. However, Laurie was a savvy online dater who was able to dig through the hundres of sites and millions of profiles for her friends to recommend compatible matches. Then after one of her friends moved in with one of his online matches, she realized she had a knack for this. (Kim, not so much...). She has created a successful business being a coach and mentor to many online dating virgins or not so virgin.
I loved how she said online dating is really more like online meeting and offline dating. It's true. The dates don't happen on the computer. You're simply scanning a profile, deciding if there's anything in common that you'd think "Hey I'd enjoy this person's company" and then you make plans to meet offline.
She offers some "vows" that all online dating virgins should take. Totally agree with all of them and some offered refreshers like don't get discouraged, which I easily do. Can't tell you how many times I deactivated my OkCupid.com account only to reactivate it a few months later.
Even though I've been doing this for awhile, I still learned some new tips:
- Wear red in your main profile pic. Apparently in 100% of studies, men find women wearing red in their photos more attractive or "desirable."?
- It's unlikely you'll like your match on paper. Laurie (and much like my friends) insist on being open-minded. Yes, have your boundaries (what you're not willing to be flexible on) but online dating gives you a chance to meet people you otherwise wouldn't.
- Watch out for scams. Apparently there are?fraudulent?members lurking around trying to get?private?information?out of you. Haven't run into this issue but a good reminder about cyber safety.
- Make ABCD lists when it comes to matches. You'll have to read what A, B, C and D mean.
- Sunday is the most active days for most sites. Who knew?
- Your first encounter is not a date, more like a second first impression.?I know some people have mixed thoughts about this. I tend to keep it casual for the first meeting because you still don't know a lot about that person. Also, if they're not what they look like in their pics or you're not clicking then you can finish your drink and make an excuse to leave.
A tip I totally agree with pertains to texting: After 10pm is booty call territory. Beware of late night texts as they send the wrong signal. And don't drink and text!
You should read this book if you're new to online dating, have tried online dating before and felt frustrated, not sure how to navigate all the dating sites or are looking for dating tips in general. This book offers advice for online and off. Although I feel like I've tried every dating site, I still learned some things. Now I just need to hire Laurie to help me meet better matches!What are your thoughts on online dating?
Disclaimer: I received a copy to review for press purposes. All opinions expressed are my own. The book's official release date is?January 8th, 2013. But it's available for pre-order now - don't miss out!once upon a time once upon a time adam shulman adam shulman dexter dexter lindsay lohan
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